Check the Chivalry at the Door, Please

Don't get me wrong, I love a bit of chivalry. 

However ...

My classroom is a chivalry-free zone. 

I know most of you are scratching your heads. Let me explain. 

Gentlemen, by doing everything gun-related for your wives, you're hampering their learning. If your spouse is going to learn to shoot, you cannot be loading their magazines and guns for them. In your politeness, you're handicapping your spouse. Unintentionally, you're undermining their confidence with their own weapon. I understand that's not your intent. Truly, I do. But stop it! Let your spouses struggle a little bit while loading their own mags. Let them fumble through the administrative handling of their guns. Men, if you are the gun enthusiast in your household, and you have the knowledge, be available to answer questions and to guide your spouses through tasks, but do not do it for them.

Ladies, you need to step up and take ownership of your learning. When I ask you what you're shooting today, you should at least know the make, model, and caliber of your gun. I shouldn't be receiving blank, panicked looks. When I ask, at the beginning of class, for you to bring your bagged gun up to the front to unload and show clear, you need to be the one doing it. YOU alone are responsible for knowing the status of your gun. If I ask you to come to the front to unload and show clear, and you don't know how to do it. That's okay! I'll teach you.. As my friend, Vicki Farnam, says, "own your magnificence". Part of doing that is taking ownership.

Our spouses are not our gun bearers, around to hand us our pre-loaded gun just in time to take the shot on safari, so stop relying on them to do so. When the shit hits the fan, and you're home alone, what are you going to do?

It is our duty, as gun owners, to own our guns. All aspects: loading, unloading, safe storage, cleaning. 

All. Of. It.

You will never be fully comfortable or confident with your gun if you are not in charge of the caretaking of said gun. So, ladies, step up and put in the work. 

Responsibilities of a CCW Permitee

Changes to the Colorado Concealed Handgun Permit permitting and renewal process (Colorado House Bill 24-1174) require CHP (formerly CCW) permit-holders to complete a mandatory training class as of July 1, 2025.

Despite the fact that one of my side gigs is a firearm instructor, I am not a fan of mandatory training. Adding expensive requirements to our right to bear arms goes against everything I believe in. We (I use the term loosely) are making firearms ownership and usage too expensive for the people who really need to have the ability to protect themselves and their families. And, as GunDude Mez is a fan of saying, "pass enough laws and everyone's a criminal".

Having said that, I had an eye-opening experience recently regarding training. I co-instructed our renewal course. We've been teaching the renewal course for a few months now, but last week was the first one I'd co-instructed.

Let me tell you, I was less than impressed. These CCW permit holders have had their permits for five years, and were due for renewal. I expected, at minimum, for the renewal students to have some level of comfort with basic gun handling. What I did not expect was for eleven of the twelve students up for renewal to have zero level of comfort with their guns. 

At the beginning of class, I always make the students come up, one by one, to our designated "safe" area to unload and show clear. It serves two purposes: 1) I can personally visually and physically check their pistols and magazines, and 2) I can immediately tell their level of safety and proficiency. Most looked at me blankly when I asked them to unload and show clear, then tried to hand me their bagged or boxed guns for me to do it. 

During the few minutes I have with each of them, I ask them about what they're shooting and what their carry rig looks like. More blank looks. We had a student with a revolver in a purse with a sticky holster, and another with an Urban Carry deep concealment rig. Now, I don't mind purse carry at all. In fact, that's my carry method of choice, so I wasn't about to give her any grief. Instead, I took a few minutes before class started to explain why she needed to have her gun secured in her purse with an appropriate holster, and gave her some resources. The Urban Carry guy? I just sighed and asked if he had any other method of carry with him. He did not.

We reviewed all of the changes to the Colorado law, as required, answered some questions, then broke up into two groups to go to the range. Our shooting test requires students to draw from holster, move and shoot, clear a malfunction, shoot from cover, and perform an emergency reload. None of it is very difficult, and all are skills that might be required if someone needs to use their gun for self-defense.

The very first shot, we had a bleeder. He'd crossed his thumbs behind his slide and cut himself so deeply that I sent him to Urgent Care for stitches. While I was off the range, patching him up and dealing with gathering his things, my range partner had to excuse someone who missed the target with all five of their first shots at three yards. We didn't even make it through the first range exercise and had to send two students on their way.

Not our actual range floor, but close enough.

Now, I told you all of that to tell you this:

If you are going to carry a gun for self-protection, you MUST be competent with the gun. I don't know how many times I have to tell students that guns are not a magic talisman. You cannot become competent with your gun in one eight-hour required course. You must seek out additional training and practice.

As a concealed carrier, you have some basic responsibilities, the first one being, you need to make sure you're an asset, not a liability. In order to ensure you're an asset to the community, at the very least, you should be able to:

• Safely handle your gun in all instances, including, and especially, administrative handling.
• Understand the mechanics of your gun, and where all of the controls are. You should have achieved at least conscious competence with your gun. If you have no idea what I'm talking about, check out this article.
• Choose a quality holster that meets the three holster requirements (cover trigger, securely hold the gun, and provide a consistent draw).
• Safely draw and reholster your gun, without muzzling yourself or others.
• Have a solid, repeatable grip.
• Place rounds on target at a variety of distances.

If you cannot check off the six bullet points above, you have zero business carrying a gun. Period.

Are there other responsibilities? Absolutely! But those aren't the point of this post, and are a moot point if you cannot safely handle your gun and put rounds on target in the first place.